Saturday, November 03, 2007

HEY!!! THAT THING GOT A HAMMY???



After mentioning it a few times myself, (as well as some motherly encouragement from my M-I-L), my wonderful (but aging) husband decided that he'd had enough and it was finally time to get back into shape. Every time I brought it up in the past, his typical answer was: "I'm in shape...round is a shape!" BUT, with another kiddo coming in December, & a Energizer Bunny for an almost 3 yr old...he knew his energy was falling behind, and it was time to go and work out at the John Deere Dubuque Works Fitness Center. We both have memberships, but the only times he's ever been in there was to show the family around the facilities!!! But anyway, on with the story...

The first night he came home bragging about how he could still do AT LEAST ONE REP of his maximum barbell weight for each of the free weight exercises that he did in college. He told of putting the biggest weights on either side of the small curl bar & curling it...and looking really cool because the HUGE weights were on such a small bar...and that everything seemed to be a breeze. But, the second night was a whole different story. He could barely walk through the door!!! The way I understood the story was this:

There was a skinny, scrappy guy there that my husband knows from Deere...and my guess is that husband was getting a bit of a complex. The other guy was in there working out, (about half the size & weight of my hubby)...but lifting just as much as he did...if not more!!! As time went on, Chris tried to keep up, but the guy could match everything he did. Knowing that he couldn't out lift the other guy (for the time being), my hubby got another great idea while he was catching his breath & taking a break. He watched as the other guy effortlessly pranced around the gym multiple times on the running track. He figured that he would challenge him to a race...mano y mano!!! (Which means "hand to hand" in Spanish...as typically refered to in combat). I guess he figured that if a really old fat guy blew away a scrappy young feller in front of a bunch of people in the gym, he could prove that he was still in the running...(no pun intended!!!) SO, Chris asked the other guy if he was good at sprints...and he said, "Yeah, in my day..." So the duel was on...it was agreed upon that they would do 1/2 a lap, and then on the straight-away, it was an all-out sprint to the death...or at least to the other side of the gym. While on the 1/2 lap pre-start, the other guy was amazed that Chris didn't warm up or stretch out or anything...and asked in few or more words if that would be a problem. Of course, my manly man said, "Nah, I am about as limber as timber...and stretching doesn't help out anyway!!!" As soon as that was said, the olympians rounded the last corner...came to the straight portion....and ramped up to "full speed". Chris said the first 50 ft. went really well...just checkin' out what the other guy could do...and matched him, no problem!!!" The race was about 1/2 over, and it was time for my love to crank it up another notch...kick in turbo boost & fly past the other guy. WELL, turbo boost worked great for a little while, and the fat guy was CLEARLY pulling away from the skinny guy...then something snapped...not good!!! My superman ran into some kryptonite!!! The best he could describe it was that it felt like someone shot him in the back of the right leg. The end of the race was a few steps away, and so he decided to just "walk it off" and do stretches AFTER running...quite the man!!!

The next day after limping around all day, Chris described what had happened, (out of context from the race, of course) and everyone asked if it was black and blue...which was a perfect sign of a torn up hamstring!!! Well, he hadn't noticed it the first night, and didn't think to check...but tonight...this is what it looked like!!!



I love my man...although he can act quite childish sometimes. I guess if this is his form of a mid-life crisis, then I am thankful that I don't have much to worry about!!!

PUBLISHER'S NOTE: This particular blog entry was written in third-person limited viewpoint...of which Liza had nothing to do with!!! It is her husband's interpretations & predictions of what is going through her mind during this whole story. I am sure if you have been reading this blog diligently, it is blatantly obvious!!! BUT, she's in Bellefontaine, Ohio until Nov. 11th, so I thought I'd try my hand at this BLOG STUFF!!! The next few months will be quite interesting, so stay tuned!!!

2 comments:

Alexis Jacobs said...

Ouch!!!

it's me, Val said...

omg......owwwwwww! Hope he's feeling better!